SORORITY PARTY MASSACRE

Here we have it, the new low-budget 80’s throwback Horror/Comedy “Sorority Party Massacre”. The film stars some gorgeous girls, the likes of Marissa Skell, Eve Mauro, Yvette Yates, Casey Fitzgerald, Rebecca Grant and Adrian Kirk. In addition to the girls, Ed O’Ross as “Sheriff Lumpkin” and Thomas Downey as “Detective Watts”. After an incident involving police brutality Watts is placed on suspension by his Captain. The Captain agrees to get the charges thrown out if Detective Watts goes to a remote island to check up on The Captains daughter (who hasn’t checked in with him). She is supposed to be competing against various Sorority sisters for a top position on some type of committee, anyways the details are not that important (haha). Once the Detective arrives, he meets and teams up with The local Sheriff hoping to find a mysterious killer after it’s discovered women have been disappearing from this remote island for years. They must stop the killer who is knocking off the competition (pardon the pun) one by one.

This low-budget flick had a few moments of decent comedy, for one I can relate to the boat scene. The big city cop getting thrown all over the place and feeling sea sick, it’s horrible. Of course I already mentioned the amount of lovely girls in the movie, that’s always a bonus. The acting is not to bad for the most part. There are a few weaker and over the top scenes however I expect that in these types of films. It’s shot pretty nicely as well and even though the action sequences are few and far between, the makeup and prosthetics were quiet effective. The score and music was inconsistent but I really liked the southern music with rock guitar. Later in the film we get some real cheesy, sci-fi B movie music. Cross that with music from a band like “The Cat Empire” and you have a very strange mix.

This one needed a lot more blood and gore from the horror aspect, not sure if they withheld because of the budget or if they never had the intention to make a mess. The action sequences were mostly pretty lame, all we see is the aftermath of the characters deaths. The choreography and sound effects in the fight scene between Paige (Skell) and Brooklyn (Mauro) was dreadful. The timing was off and the action was weak. The lighting for the film is another big weakness. Most of the shots look like they are straight out of a daily soap like “Passions”, I hope that wasn’t the desired effect.

Look, this one had its moment’s I think it’s worth a viewing. There isn’t a lot of story and it does become pretty predictable early on (I picked the killer). At the same time though it’s got a genuine and good-natured vibe about it, gorgeous girls and classic petty banter. I also like the fact there was a little sequel (for lack of a better word), tagged on to the end of the film which was probably better than the actual movie. Sorority Party Massacre takes full advantage of the 80’s campy atmosphere and that’s worth something.

My rating for “Sorority Party Massacre” is 4/10

PRANK

First time filmmaker, Yiuwing Lam present’s his low-budget found footage style film “Prank”. The subject matter is about school bullying and victims of that bullying. It stars Nick Renaud, Henry Monfries, Hannah Kasulka and Alastair James. “Dax” (James) has apparently been bullying “Connor” (Renaud), for years and doesn’t treat “Jordan” (Monfries) that much better. The two victims set out to get revenge by trying to pull off the biggest prank on Dax. Now I’m not to sure if Lam himself is the smart/nerdy type and if he is drawing on experiences in his own life, or if it’s just a fictional idea? Either way, it has far to many of the predictable clichés to separate it from its neighbouring films e.g (Elephant, Bang Bang Your Dead and Home Room).

It’s mostly shot from behind the handy-cam by whoever has it at the time. It’s not so much a found footage film because things are being recorded on the fly (Cloverfield style). The camera work is okay but the editing is very choppy and a constant beep on and off every time a new scene is started. The acting is average, I guess for the quality of the script our two main actors can only do so much. I think that deep down there is a message that could have resonated amongst viewers if the story was developed much better. Instead the message about bullying and people’s actions and the consequences that go along with those get lost in this drivel.

The film basically stereotypes all teens that may have been bullied at one time or another in their lives. Basically if you are interested in anything to do with space be it, tv shows, movies, comic books and conventions or you’re smart, you read or you have glasses you will be bullied. We know this isn’t true. Even the most popular of people can suffer from bullying. I think everyone suffers from some form of it throughout the course of there lives. To define it with these aspects is just wrong. The dialogue in the movie seems mostly improvised and trust me it shows. Two teenagers would not talk the way these guys do. Especially the way Connor talks, he uses words adults wouldn’t even understand, it’s screaming “look at how nerdy I am”.

Another issue is that the score and music is non-existent. I don’t think I have ever watched a film without a single piece of music or a score, this would be a first. We don’t really feel what these kids are going through and therefore can’t connect to them. The extent of the bullying we here about is never really shown, the story could have perhaps been told across a 10 year period, just an idea. I wasn’t even clear on what the plan for revenge was, they spend ages talking about the perfect prank and goofing around in clown masks and setting up a random birthday party, what was that all about? And in the process nothing ever gets clarified.

After forty minutes of this painfully cliché and pretentious “artistic” school bullying film, I had to turn it off. I’m not sure why people are labelling this clever and smart, with a good twist. I did skip to the end, I couldn’t find a twist. Maybe I missed something, If I did, I’m glad I did. The coolest thing about this film is the poster artwork, It’s a movie beyond disappointing. This would be one of the absolute worst things I have seen in a long time.

My rating for “Prank” is 1.5/10

OOGA BOOGA

“Ooga Booga” is the latest horror/comedy film from director Charles Band. Band has been responsible for some really cheesy but fun movies of the years. “The Evil Bong Films”, “The Gingerdead Man” and “Blood Dolls”, just to name a few. He averages a couple of films a year, this year he brings us the story of an evil doll (seems to be a favourite theme of his). Ooga Booga is a black doll made by “Hambo” the pig (played by Chance Reardon), a disgruntled host of a kids tv show. After “Devin” (Wade F Wilson) is caught up in a robbery and killed by dirty cops his spirit is transferred into the doll. With the help of his girlfriend “Donna” (Ciarra Carter) Devin must exact his revenge in order to have his spirit free of the doll.

So yeah. That’s pretty much the story. Even though this sounds like a ridiculous and non-sensical plot for a film, it had the potential to reach some kind of cult status amongst hardcore fans of this style of filmmaking. You have to acknowledge Charles original idea. He shoots this thing really well, lots of low down camera panning from Ooga’s point of view. It’s a very cute doll though and I’m not sure if I was supposed to find it menacing. If I was then it failed, I actually thought it was very funny. I will make a quick mention of Amber Strauser who plays (Peggy Suey) in the opening ten minutes of the film. She looked stunning and did a solid job, it’s a shame her role in the film is basically useless.

The issues with this one (wow-wee). The acting is horribly over the top, I’m sure this is done on purpose and the actors have been directed that way. However it makes for some truly cringe worthy moments. The opening scene is as painful as they come, we watch “Hambo” the pig looking at pornography and talking in the most annoying voice ever recorded on film. Nobody speaks like that not even on a kids show, and I mean nobody! The dialogue for the whole film is completely unrealistic even for bigots and racists (which the film is made up of). They just wouldn’t sound the way they do throughout this film. There is a constant game-show/tv sitcom jingle and a corny score several times during the course of this, it sounds really out-of-place.

To add to all that the convenience store the murder takes place in just looks like somebody’s house (maybe two rooms in a house). It’s really poorly designed, you’d think you would at least shoot in a real convenience store. The way Devin actually transfers to the doll was also really lame and unclear as to how that took place. I very much doubt a doll this small would actually be able to do any harm to anyone. I guess I can let that part of it go, otherwise if you can’t take this for what it is your better off giving it a miss. There is virtually no blood or gore which was very disappointing. The comedic moments were few and far between. This over the top group of racist white guys spout off something about “Porkoff hitler and his donut” in reference to the cops…(really random and doesn’t make any sense) This whole thing is painfully unfunny.

To sum this one up in one word I would say it’s “uneventful”. There is barely a story, the effects and the set designs are embarrassingly bad. Some of the acting is okay, if not for the parts that are purposely over the top. The masturbation scene, all be it very wrong was pretty funny but that was the only comedic part. I was hoping this would be destined for the cult status pile, suffice it to say just the regular bin will do fine.

My rating for “Ooga Booga” is 2/10

AFTERSHOCK

Director Nicolas Lopez takes on his first film aimed for the American market. “Aftershock” tells the story of a group of travellers in Chile. While partying one night there is a huge earthquake, which is only the beginning of more bad things to come. The films lead is Eli Roth (Inglourious Basterds, Cabin Fever) as Gringo, an American who is visiting his friend Ariel (played by Ariel Levy). The cast also includes a Johnny Galecki (Big Bang Theory) look a like named Pollo (played by Nicolas Martinez) I swear the guy is Mr Galecki’s twin! To round out the group we have three beautiful european ladies Monica, Irina and Kylie (Andrea Osvart, Natasha Yarovenko and Lorenza Izzo).

The first 30 minutes of the film is all about the dynamic between Gringo and Ariel who are good friends. Pollo is one of Ariel’s friends but doesn’t really know Gringo, so the two tend to just put up with each other for the sake of their mutual friend. The group go on various tourist like adventures and then at night they party in the clubs. We find out Gringo has a daughter, I didn’t really find that a crucial detail in the story though. I assume that he’s involved in some corporate marketing type of job, I’m not really sure, It’s never that clear why he is in Chile in the first place, Was it just a vacation? I guess it’s not that important. It’s really good to see Eli Roth play a serious and mature role. Don’t get me wrong, I like the crazy personalities of some of the characters he has played in other films. For example, his own directorial debut “Cabin Fever” and also “Inglourious Basterds”, but he really settles down nicely in this role.

The girls are stunning in this. Both Natasha and Lorenzo don’t have a lot of experience, which makes their performances with characters in a high emotional state, all the more impressive. The film is shot pretty well too. There is a good soundtrack to support the change in the tone of the story. We get some great European Dance and House music, also a really suspenseful score after the mayhem starts. The prosthetic and makeup effects were quiet good too. I was expecting a bit more of a realistic look to the blood, but I think it was intentionally a bit more red than normal. Along with the effects there are some nice kill scenes, the script takes a while to evolve but in the end it’s worth the wait. There is a standout kill scene involving fire but I wont spoil it for you because it was impressive.

Moreover, a nice little twist towards the end left me content with most of what I saw. There are a couple of heavy scenes involving a group of prisoners that escaped amidst all the madness. I suppose the gangs actions are something you would come to expect from truly evil people like this. Sadly they dont’ really get their just deserts, that was disappointing. I felt the comedy in the first act of the film missed the mark as well. It’s probably the writing and not the actual delivery which was fine. The story is a little bit loose on details here and there and takes a good 40 minutes before any action starts to unfold. Some people can have a problem with that, I felt it building so it didn’t bother me.

However, the film’s biggest weakness was probably the shooting style of the earthquake. I read this thing had a $2 million dollar budget, yet it seems as though someone is just shaking the camera profusely. Honestly it was like something from the Syfy channel or what you would see in an old disaster film like “Earthquake”, with Charlton Heston (haha). They made up for how underwhelming the special effects looked by at least putting in some blood and gore. None the less, with a budget like this I was expecting some impressive set designs and earthquake carnage.

I think Aftershock delivered exactly what people would expect. Some solid acting and for once, characters you actually care about and want to survive. Plenty of the red stuff, some great kill sequences and a fun little twist towards the end. It’s graphic and violent in several scenes but I think it’s all in the context of what is happening to our group of friends. I commend Eli on the writing too. I haven’t seen a blend of Earthquake/Horror before, so well done!

My rating for “Aftershock” is 6/10

The following is a list of my top films beginning with numbers or A’s

50/50    8.5/10

Will Reiser (Writer/Director) uses his real life experience of dealing with a rare form of spinal cancer in writing and directing this little indie gem called 50/50. With a great cast and an amazing performance from Joseph Gordon Levitt as “Adam”, the patient. It’s wonderful indie style soundtrack and personal camera work put you in the shoes of this very sick young man. It’s honest, at times funny and ultimately a very emotional take on a serious subject matter that is handled with absolute perfection.

2012    8/10       

Roland Emmerich’s 2009 epic disaster film “2012” is brilliant. With its outstanding special effects, realistic characters and fantastic action sequences, this is one hell of a ride. It’s over 2 hours or pure escapism. Even though it’s not a plausible event it’s still very entertaining. You have to acknowledge the attention to detail that went into creating this larger than life catastrophic event. It makes you feel like you are really a part of it, it’s only disappointment, it wasn’t in 3D!

388 Arletta Avenue  8/10

Randall Cole’s brilliantly crafted 388 Arletta Avenue is a guilty pleasure of mine. The tension is fantastic, the camera work original and very particular. The performance from Nick Stahl is really engaging. The whole thing hinges on his descent into madness, which is portrayed very well. The combination of music and score to build the suspense is great. The climax to the film is very surprising and If not for a few loose holes in the story this could have been even better.

A Nightmare On Elm Street (2010)    8/10

Samuel Bayer’s remake of the 80’s classic horror film “Nightmare on Elm Street” is fantastic. Introducing Jackie Haley as the new Freddy Krueger was a risky move but in the end a great choice. Very solid acting for a horror film, some great memorable kill sequences. Great tension in the dream sequences built with subtle sound effects. Most importantly, the detailed back story we have never had on Fred Krueger. All these aspects are the reason this is one of the best modern horror remakes.

A Simple Plan 8.5/10

Sam Raimi’s fantastic adaption of Scott B Smith’s novel “A Simple Plan” will have you on the edge of your seat from the word go. Amazing performances from both Bill Paxton and especially Billy Bob Thornton as “Jacob” who is a very lost soul. This is the perfect depiction of what money and greed can do to family and friends. It’s unbelievably realistic in the way the story unfolds and the way the trio find themselves in a web of lies and cover ups. Filmed in a beautiful landscape in the middle of winter makes this one crisp looking suspense/thriller.

The Adjustment Bureau  8/10

In 2011, George Nolfi came out of nowhere with the mystery/romance/thriller “The Adjustment Bureau”. A great cast including the likes of Matt Damon, Emily Blunt, Michael Kelly and Anthony Mackie bring all the characters to life. A wonderful and original concept pulled off like a perfect bank robbery. A cleverly woven script that gives you a great moral to live by and a big payoff by the end.

Alpha Dog 8.5/10

Nick Cassavetes drama “Alpha Dog”, based on the real life drug dealer “Jesse James Hollywood” is raw, edgy and very powerful. A wonderful ensemble cast include the likes of Bruce Willis, Ben Foster, Emile Hirsch, Justin Timberlake, Anton Yelchin, Sharon Stone and Olivia Wilde. Even with its 350+ profanity words and heavy drug use and violence, it never loses sight of its depiction of this world of crime and drugs and the lives of people in it.

American History X  9/10

Tony Kaye made the whole film world step up and take notice, when in 1998 he delivered one of the finest films of the last 20 years. “American History X” looks at issues of racism and brainwashing power in a way no other film has. With an all-star cast including the likes of Edward Norton, Edward Furlong, Stacy Keach and Ethan Suplee. This movie is a must see for its authentic and bold style of depicting some of the worst qualities in humans. It’s violent, its brutal and it’s ugly just like the nature of the subject at hand.

American Pie  8.5/10

1999’s “American Pie” bought us the first franchise in a new wave of raunchy comedy films that are still being replicated to this day. This had a great young cast of new upcoming actors and actresses. With clever and witty dialogue and plenty of laughs this one of a kind comedy delivers like no other. Accompanied by a great soundtrack of various bands, some mainstream and some indie. There isn’t a single person out there that can’t relate to the film and its wild lessons in maturing and growing up.

American Pie Reunion  8/10

It should be no surprise that when the returning cast from the original film get back to it 13 years later it’s just as impressive. I was a fan of the whole franchise but the last installment in the series really bought the story full circle. More comedy from the brilliant Eugene Levy and the return of many more of our favourite characters from the original. How could this not be almost as great as that very first viewing of the original.

American Psycho  9/10

Mary Harron stepped up to direct an adaption of one of the most controversial novels of its time, Bret Easton Ellis’s “American Psycho”. The outstanding cast includes Christian Bale, Willem Dafoe, Josh Lucas, Jared Leto, Chloe Sevigny and many more. From the amazingly well written and perfectly paced screenplay, to the authentic sounds and music of the 80’s. It’s a wonderful depiction of Yuppie 80’s wall street executives and on the surface personas and appearances. It has wonderful dark humour, brutal violence in the context of the storytelling and one of the greatest most ambiguous and discussed endings of any film from its time period.

Anchorman  8/10

Well known director Adam Mckay freshened up the comedy genre in 2004. The over the top news broadcasting team led by Ron Burgundy in “Anchorman”. This film had something for everyone, it depicts relationships with men vs women and equal opportunity in the most hilarious way possible. Will Ferrell gives the best performance of his career, along with the likes of Paul Rudd, Steve Carell, David Koechner and Christina Applegate. It’s not one for everybody but if you like these off the wall style comedies, it’s by far the best one that’s been made. It contains plenty of memorable scenes you will be laughing about with your friends for years to come.

Apt Pupil   8/10

The late and great Brad Renfro (R.I.P) turns in a standout performance in Bryan Singer’s adaption of the Stephen King novel “Apt Pupil”. It’s such an original and compelling story about a young teen boy being exposed to too many real life war stories. It starts to send him mad and he slowly loses his grip on reality. It’s about blackmail, deceit and the dangerous cat and mouse game between two. Our War Veteran, played brilliantly by Ian McKellen and Todd Bowden (Renfro). It doesn’t refrain from pulling any punches and no doubt will leave you with a sinking feeling deep in your stomach long after the credits roll.

Arlington Road  8.5/10

“Arlington Road” is a suspense/thriller that was glossed over back in 1999. I’m not sure why because its one fantastic film. It stars both Tim Robbins and Jeff Bridges who play neighbours in small town suburbia. Both are from different backgrounds, Bridges begins to suspect Robbins of being a terrorist. This is something I have never seen depicted in another film, before 99 or even since. It’s completely original, has some great twists and turns, plenty of back story and ultimately an ending that will leave you in absolute shock. This is up there with the absolute best films of the 90’s.

Argo  9/10

Ben Affleck is 3 for 3 with his directing resume. Argo tells the true story about an operation launched by the CIA. Trying to ex-filtrate 6 Americans out of Tehran during the hostage crisis in Iran in 1980. What a subject matter to take on and the importance in telling it with integrity. Mr Affleck blows us away with such wonderful attention to detail and authenticity about the look, facts and mood of the film. No detail is left undiscovered or underdeveloped. If not for a couple of minor far-fetched plot points this would be the definition of a perfect film.

Avatar  8/10

James Cameron’s enormous budget sci/fi/adventure epic “Avatar” falls in my top section of films. Not so much for the story, which models itself on something like the origin of Pocahontas. It simply is so visually spectacular and captivating, unlike anything ever accomplished in film in over 100 years. It’s one of a kind, there has been nothing else to have accomplished such a feat. It has some good acting, great action sequences and was one of the first experiences with true 3D. For all those aspects it’s a wonderfully made film.

BENEATH

Larry Fessendon, director of the 2006 survival film “The Last Winter”, returns to do another full length feature called “Beneath”. It tells the story of 6 high school students, who recently graduated and are looking to celebrate. They grab some supplies and head out on boat that belongs to Johnny (Daniel Zovatto), with plans to head across the lake and party. Their plans are quickly put on hold when they find that something lurks in the water and is hunting them. The beautiful Bonnie Dennison (Stake Land) plays Kitty who Johnny is deeply in love with. However Kitty is dating Matt (Chris Conroy). Along for the trip are Simon, Zeke and Deb three of the groups friends. I couldn’t get over how much Griffin Newman playing Zeke reminded me of Elijah Wood, the two are most definitely long-lost twins.

We have seen these types of films many times before. The teenage melodrama and dynamic of a dysfunctional group who have been friends for years. It’s drama aspect is just as I describe and it adds very little in the creature feature department. Obviously its a very limited budget, I would think around $50,000. The camera work in the opening shot of the lake looks fantastic (shame its part of an irrelevant dream sequence). For the most part the camera work is good, with solid steady cam shots. However when it changes to some of the footage Zeke is filming on his handy cam, it’s painfully amateurish. There are a few moments of comedy that I chuckled at. At least two references to both the Shark Night 3D film which I thought was really fun. Also the Syfy channel with all their ridiculous titled movies such as “Dinocroc vs Supergator vs Zombies” etc, that part was funny.

But on a completely separate note we have some truly horrendous and cringe worth dialogue. Before the group heads out on the lake Johnny runs into an old man, who I am assuming is or was a friend of his fathers, I don’t really know it wasn’t clear at all. The guy says “Johnny” in the one 3 minute conversation about 8 times, I found it comedic and I don’t think it was supposed to be. Also yelling at the fish and asking it why its trying to kill you instead of trying to get to safety, yeah… Not to mention the very ordinary acting, although with a script like this I doubt anyone else could have performed better. These characters are quiet possibly the dumbest to ever appear in a frame of a film like this. One of the groups arm is bitten and so the group just lets her arm rest in the water with blood dripping out of it, with a killer fish attracted that’s attracted to blood! And to make matters worse immediately after this, one of the groups guys sticks his arm in the water to try to paddle.. I mean dumb.

Moreover, you would think while distracting the fish you would take the opportunity to swim to get away. Maybe they were to far from shore, but you could have a go at least. Instead the group attempts to paddle with no oars (yeah they lost those in a poking session with the fish haha) by using the lid of an esky, of course the result gets them nowhere. They make as much noise as possible, bickering and yelling at each other. Once the boat starts taking on water they decide to start voting people off (Survivor tv show style). This segment displayed some truly bad acting. Thats right, they also throw all their food into the water because apparently they know killer fish will eat anything (even Pringle’s and Twinkies haha) but wait, how are they going to survive without any food?

All of these characters do everything they possibly can to make you hate them. There are just so many painfully dumb moves throughout the story that you lose any respect you may have had for them. There is no background on any of our characters. Well that’s not entirely true. There is a little bit about the dynamic of Kitty, Matt and his brother Simon but it’s all teenage relationship stuff. More importantly nothing is told about the origin of this creature, why was it in the lake? If people knew about it, why wasn’t something done? The tension that should be in a film like this is non-existent, the music and score are both horrendously cheesy. It’s not like the fish even looks good (which is what the audience want), it’s a huge piece of rubber with big teeth, shortcuts were definitely taken in the construction of it. The blood and gore is also very limited due to the budget.

What we have here is a lame teenage creature feature that commands very little respect. Technically Larry gets a few things right but an underwhelming, poorly written and cheesy De Grassi episode (teen tv show) mixed with the Syfy’s worst stuff is nothing but a recipe for disaster.

My rating for “Beneath” 2.5/10

13 EERIE

“13 Eerie” is a brand new horror/sci-fi film from director Lowell Dean. It stars Katherine Isabelle (American Mary, Freddy vs Jason) Michael Shanks (Stargate SG-1) Brendan Fehr (Final Destination, Adopting Terror) and Brendan Fletcher (Tideland, Summers End). A group of six undergrads studying forensic science, head out to the campsite of an abandoned state prison for a practical exam. “Tomkins” (Shanks) is the professor who has set up cameras at various locations around the site to film the students as they practice their craft on real corpses. Captain Veneziano who has helped Tomkins organise the operation, fails to mention that illegal biological tests were run on some of the prisoners many years ago, they had horrific results. The group must attempt to survive an attack from deformed ex-convicts who are trying to eat them.

This has a great cast that also includes Jesse Moss (Tucker and Dale vs Evil) and Nick Moran (Harry Potter films). The standout performance though is from Katherine Isabelle as “Megan”. She has a great fighting spirit and the will to get through the situation, she has some pretty solid emotional scenes too. Everybody else is solid as well. It’s quick pacing and effective shooting style really take you along for the ride. We get enough of a back story to be content with the end result. The audio was also very clear, along with the score which was a bit like one of John Carpenter’s films. It had that creepy aspect “The Thing” had.

On top of the technical aspects, the movie has some fantastic kill scenes and blood and gore effects. The undead or deformed convicts (whatever you want to call them), looked really cool with horribly deformed and decaying skin. The kill scene that stands out most to me would be when Megan uses an explosive device to take out one of the mutants! The other actions scenes are pretty cool too. I’m not sure if the actors playing mutants wore full body suits or whether it was genuine makeup effects, I couldn’t really tell, so that’s a good thing.

13 Eerie does have a few minor issues that include, content of the story and some of the characters decision-making. I’m not sure how the “mutants” actually come to life, they never really made a connection. I’m guessing it had something to do with the oil and crossed wires with the generator? I’m not too sure. At the same time no one really seems that shocked that they are being attacked by these convicts. Everyone just acts like it’s a normal thing which is a very unrealistic reaction. It becomes evident the only way you can kill them is by a massive blow to the head, I’m not sure why this is the only way they can be killed, That goes unexplained as well. It’s a little bit slow to get to the action sequences which is of course what we are all waiting for. Some of the 80’s synth music was a little bit lame too and didn’t fit the nature of the film.

To sum up, what we have here is a cool little cross between “Jeepers Creepers” and the foreign film “Mutants”. Even with the film’s story issues it’s 80 minutes of good solid undead ass kicking. Great practical effects and a technically well made product make this a horror film definitely worth checking out!

My rating for “13 Eerie” is 6/10

RUSHLIGHTS

It’s been over 10 years since director Antoni Stutz has made a film. “Rushlights” is his latest film. Billy and Sarah (played by Josh Henderson and Haley Webb) are two teenagers who meet at a diner and quickly fall in love. A friend of Sarah’s dies from a drug overdose and Sarah finds a note sent to the friend informing her of an inheritance from her late uncle. Billy then hatches a plan involving Sarah (who looks like the friend) to pose as her to get the inheritance. In the mix we have the lawyer “Cameron Brogden” (played by Aidan Quinn) who is in charge of the case, along with his brother and town sheriff “Robert Brogden” (played by Beau Bridges) who is trying to figure out if foul play was involved.

I really like the cast in this one. Aidan Quinn is the stand out performer here, all is not what it seems with the sneaky lawyer. His character had a lot of different aspects that I liked. Beau Bridges was commendable too, although I think he probably did it more for the paycheck. Josh Henderson and Haley Webb have some good chemistry together but their characters are both really underdeveloped. I felt at times they were trying just a little bit to hard to sell it. It’s a very well shot film too, considering it is an independent feature. With the story being set mostly in Texas we get some great slide guitar music, along with that we get a more traditional european score. A bit like what you would hear in a Roman Polanski film, i quiet enjoyed it.

All these points aside, the film has some very weak aspects too. Henderson and Webb are supposed to be playing teenagers. This doesn’t work and not only because we know they are older actors but I don’t think two immature teenagers would be able to pull of a web of lies like this. Along with that It’s a very rushed introduction to the two characters and it’s only a week after there first conversation that Billy hatches this idea. I doubt that anybody with half a brain would go along with a plan and trust someone they just met so whole heartedly. I guess some details in the plot towards the end account for all of that though. I still like to know more than the bare minimum about the main characters. There is some issues with the lighting in several of the night scenes as well. Particularly the apartment scene in the beginning.

Moreover its a very predictable story. Minus the cool little twist towards the end, you know that Sarah’s past (once it is divulged) is going to come back to haunt her. It does, in the form of “Edward Romero” a drug dealer from Los Angeles. Edward chases the couple here there and everywhere trying to get money that he is owed. Billy and Sarah are supposed to be the protagonists but its hard to relate to them because they are difficult to like. I would think you would need more than identification to prove who you are when it comes to inheritance wouldn’t you? They also make several really bad decisions, like issues with Edward’s car and his gun. You would do your best to hide both of those things in a much better place then they do, yet somehow they are never found out. Robert is portrayed as a smart cop but I don’t think he is, else he would have figured it out pretty quickly.

This is not a bad film, if you’re looking for 90 minutes to kill, its got some things to like about it. Technically there aren’t to many issues, once again its in character and plot development that the story falls down. It’s a bit like a poor man’s Coen Brothers film (Fargo, Blood Simple) but I still think it’s a bit of fun.

My rating for “Rushlights” is 5/10

NO ONE LIVES

Ryuhei Kitamura director of “Versus” and “The Midnight Meat Train” returns here with his latest American horror film “No One Lives”. The film stars Luke Evans (Clash Of The Titans, Immortals) Adelaide Clemens (Silent Hill Revelation) Derek Magyar and America Olivo. A gang of ruthless criminals and psychopaths kidnap a wealthy couple in the hope of extracting money from them. What they don’t know, is that all is not as it seems with the couple travelling across the country looking for a fresh start.

This has a really cool cast of actors/actresses with varying degrees of experience. Lee Tergesen (The Collection), who plays “Hoag” the boss of the gang, did a great job of the role. Derek Magyar as “Flynn” eventually takes on that role and is just as solid. Olivo as “Tamara”, Beau Knapp as “Denny” and Lindsey Shaw as “Amber” round out the group. I thought that Luke Evans seemed really dis-interested in his character in the opening few scenes of the film. However once the pace picks up he gets right into it, that was pleasing to see. I’ve been a big fan of Adelaide Clemens (who features as a main character in the film) for a long time. She did a great little Aussie film a while back called “Wasted On The Young” and also took the lead in the very impressive “Silent Hill Revelations” earlier this year. The role she landed here has her very much out of her depth. The character had a lot of psychological baggage due to certain events in the film. I never felt Clemens truly understood the character of Emma or the position she was in. Also she features in the very opening scene of the film, which I found to be very underwhelming. These genre films normally start with a real bang, the introduction to this one was very mediocre. Thankfully things didn’t stay that way.

It’s a very quick paced horror film with lots of fast and witty dialogue. That was the main difference between this and your typical run of the mill horror flick. This had sufficient and relevant dialogue. We learn a few details about Luke Evans characters relationship with his current girlfriend “Betty”. We are lead to believe he has cheated on her or done something deceitful recently, hence the move across country. It’s a really well shot film too. The dynamic of the gang worked really well, everyone seem to feed off of other people’s energy and vibes. It’s a really well shot film with some fantastic inventive and original kill scenes. Some of which I have never seen attempted before. Believe me when I say they don’t hold back on the red stuff either! The gore based effects were great.

However, the one kill scene that stood out to me because of its originality and brutal nature probably wasn’t feasible. It would have taken the special effects team quiet an effort to make it happen but yeah.. stretching the realm of possibility (those who have seen it will know what I’m talking about). There are a few small holes in the film too. At one point one of the gang members mentions trying to get to the Jeep to fix it and get away. Well it wasn’t a Jeep it was just a regular Sedan. I suppose a detail like that is not that important just an error in the writing. Some of the shots in the film are probably to dark but for the most part it works well just some of the indoor scenes weren’t lit as well. I think the score was lacking too. A good score and suspense go hand in hand and both of those aspects were uneven, the saving grace is the action in the film.

In the end I look at this for exactly what it was, 80 minutes of fast paced gory fun. There are a few nice little twists and turns throughout. We are given a psychopath who is surely not a good guy but at the same-time he is attempting to rid the world of some pretty horrible human beings. So you can get on board with that aspect. I’m not to sure about the ending or his reasoning for letting go of the hold he has over Emma, I guess that shall remain a mystery.

My rating for “No One Lives” is 6.5/10

COTTAGE COUNTRY

Peter Wellington has directed mostly short tv series and the odd tv movie.”Cottage Country” is pretty much his first attempt at sizeable budget film making. The film stars the lovely Malin Akerman (Rock of Ages, Catch 44) as “Cammie Ryan” and Tyler Labine (Tucker and Dale vs Evil, Antitrust) as “Todd Chipowski”. The two are an embarrassingly cute couple that are about to take a trip to the Chipowski family cottage for a relaxing weekend in the country. Todd plans to ask Cammie to marry him. His plans are put on hold when his reckless loser brother “Salinger” (played by Dan Petronijevic)) arrives at the cottage with his Russian girlfriend “Masha” (Lucy Punch). The comedic aspect of the film comes about in Todd’s attempt to get Salinger along with his girlfriend to leave.

In a film of this particular sub-genre it’s hard not to see Labine as his character of “Dale” from “Tucker and Dale vs Evil”. He basically plays the same kind of loveable oaf who just seems awkward, even in normal situations. The script wasn’t anywhere near the quality of some of the other films Labine’s has acted in. The funny lines that he normally has were non-existent. I did like the cute pet names the couple had for each other though. Toodles and Cuddlebum haha, very embarrassing but funny (one of those relationships). Salinger also supplied a few comedic moments with his over the top antics, he was a little crude but funny none the less. Akerman is okay in this film but in hindsight probably not the correct casting choice. Labine is decent too, I just don’t think he has a lot to work with this time around.

There is some really beautiful shots of the cottage throughout the film and some great old style pieces of music to support the aesthetic look. Overall the whole thing is really well shot, lots of sweeping camera work, I would have thought they would have used a dolly on a track for several shots. I thought the gore aspect was pretty impressive too. One or two nice kill scenes but sadly there are large portions of the film where not a lot happens, these are the killer (pardon the pun). The couples don’t even attempt to put in much effort into hiding the bodies of the people they kill. For comedic sake, I understand that choice in the writing, it’s just not very realistic. The acting in several scenes is fairly over the top too. The whole thing feels to slow, even at just 90 minutes. The party scene for one drags on way to long. I like this new modern horror/comedy genre, I think there just needed to be more story and action here. The killing your brother scenario is just kind of silly, because we know regardless of how heated an argument gets it’s just not a realistic action to take.

I thought the final scene had a few things to like about it. The comedy while driving and texting during a car chase supplied a few chuckles. The action sequence to end the film was pretty dark but still enjoyable. For those of you who are desperate to see a good horror/comedy, stick to some of the more mainstream work. This is a fairly average version of a classic film. Picture, “Weekend At Bernie’s” but with blood and gore in replace of the clever comedy aspect.

My rating for “Cottage Country” 4.5/10

MANIAC

Franck Khalfoun director of P2 along with Alexandre Aja (Hills Have Eyes, Piranha 3D), return to the big screen with their remake of the 1980 cult classic “Maniac”. I didn’t ever see the original Maniac film so I had no preconceptions on what to expect from a modern-day telling. The film stars Elijah Wood as “Frank” (Sin City, Lord Of The Rings) along with the beautiful Nora Arnezeder (Safe House,The Words) as “Anna” and America Olivo (No One Lives, Bitchslap) as Frank’s Mother.

Frank is a sociopathic and lonely man who own’s a mannequin shop in Los Angeles. After he helps Anna, a young artist with her mannequin exhibition, he develops a dangerous obsession that manifests itself in a deadly way. I’m a huge fan of Alexandre Aja’s work, I don’t think he directed this remake but he did assist with the writing process. It’s a tricky subject matter that has to be handled with absolute precision. Elijah Wood as Frank, gives his best performance to date. Along with his role as “Kevin” in Robert Rodriguez’s “Sin City”, Elijah also played “Johnny Shaw” in a recent film called “Pawn Shop Chronicles”. The role here was tailor-made for Elijah. He turns in an unbelievably dark and creepy performance with a perfect tone and frantic breathing patterns, he sends shivers down your spine. This desired effect comes about not only through his performance but the camera work and score. The film is shot POV (point of view) style and it really works. They do it nowadays with first person video games, it’s very effective. You won’t get a closer connection to Frank then living in his shoes and experiencing what he is going through. Sadly the camera work does change a few times and you get some messy handheld stuff in the mix.

The score is also very particular. It’s appreciation for the original film is evident by several nod’s to things from the 80’s. A lot of heavily synth and bass orientated music is used. It reminded me a lot of Nicolas Winding Refn’s “Drive” soundtrack. Later the score becomes more european, with classical pieces that accompany the lighter scenes (for lack of a better word). People will notice the nod to the original film’s poster and artwork. This is during one of the murder scenes (keep an eye out). The violence is portrayed as realistically as possible and in some scenes it can be very brutal. The opening scene to the film is the most eerie and stands out for its abrupt climax.

There are no doubt still some issues with Maniac. I think the character of Frank is really underdeveloped. That may have been intended but it’s not amicable in connecting with the audience. The director has limited the potential with a fairly by the numbers script and hasn’t had imput into more development in the characters. The entire film needs more dialogue. I doubt this had more than 50 pages of dialogue for the entire running time. We get a little bit of insight into Frank’s childhood, through a few flashbacks and one or two very brief conversations he has. It’s obvious that his mother was an escort or hooker, I think? Either that or she was trying to find a man to settle down with and it wasn’t happening. By all accounts Frank doesn’t witness any violence and violence isn’t present in his life. Now this is not to say violence is the only thing that can cause one to be violent later on in life because we know that’s not true. I just find it hard to believe someone can be this delusional without any warning signs? I think plain and simply Frank’s mother needed to be present more in the storytelling aspect. We are lead to believe that she is the trigger to Frank’s violent tendencies

Moreover, I just assumed that Frank sees every women in the world as his mum. In some way, shape or form, various characteristics of the women in his life, either that he meets or he stalks, remind him of his mother. This is the catalyst in his panic attacks which then lead to his violent outbursts. That’s how I read the film anyway. I think some of the women he kills should have been screaming a lot more than they were too! If you feared that desperately for your life you would put on a turn, wouldn’t you? I also thought the last ten minutes of the film were very convoluted. I couldn’t make out what was happening with him turning into a mannequin? or something. I admired the prosthetic and gore effects in that sequence but was lost in the translation of the ending.

This really is a very well made film, for what it is. Majority of people won’t like this or its artistic merit. This is not a film for the mass of critics out there, however if you were a fan of the original or even if you haven’t seen it but like cult films, check this one out. It’s a well paced, unnerving and brutal descent into madness. Apparently the film has been banned in New Zealand, so lets hope Australia gives it the nod!

My rating for “Maniac” is 6/10

EVIDENCE

“Evidence” (not to be confused with the other independent horror film of 2012 with the same title) is a new Horror/Thriller. The film stars Stephen Moyer (True Blood) Radha Mitchell (Silent Hill, Rogue) and Torrey DeVitto (One Tree Hill, True Blood). There are also small roles from Nolan Gerard Funk (Bereavement) and Caitlin Stasey who is from right here in Australia.

The film pits two detectives, Reese and Burquez (Moyer and Mitchell) against a very clever serial killer responsible for a massacre. The detectives are trying to solve a recent series of murders that occurred at an abandoned gas station. Most of the film is shot POV style (Point of View), they watch video footage found at the crime scene, chronicling the events leading up to the crime. So they see everything that was recorded by the survivors and sift through it to find clues to who the killer might be. There are some really clever still shots in the camera work at the very beginning. Sadly with the rest of the film being found footage there’s a lot of movement and camera glitches, due to the various plot progressions. It’s a realistic view-point, but not a very nice one to watch.

The acting from everyone is pretty good. Radha and Stephen don’t have as big a parts in the film, so sadly their talents are a little bit wasted. We get very few details on the backgrounds of either of them. Five minutes of conversation from Detective Reese (Moyer) to Leann (DeVitto) about why he has been on a leave of absence is about the extent of it. Caitlin Stasey looks stunning in the film, Her character had a lot of likeability about her for you to warm too. Once again though, the scenes with her and Leann feel forced and the dialogue really gives the viewer nothing to go on. Nothing interesting or realistic seems to be being said, it is painfully obvious that this is acting.

Moreover, the score is another thing that is non-existent. Other than a few sound effects, I can’t recall a single piece of music. That is a little strange even for a found footage film. The suspense throughout wasn’t to bad, I did get a few surprise jump scares, which were fun. The story has a few holes in it though. Tyler (Funk) disappears for a huge chunk of the film and it’s never explained where he has gone, the cops don’t even seem to pick up on it, which I thought was strange (seeing as he could be a suspect). The motive behind the killings is hidden for practically the whole film. Even after the final twist it’s never really evident why any of it occurred. I suppose in a way maybe it was, It was just a really weak development and motive. The ending does have a decent twist but unfortunately I do think it puts a damper on the whole thing. It’s not a direction I would have taken.

This is actually not a bad effort for a found footage film. I think I would have shot this in a more conventional style though. The surveillance technique will be the downfall of this, that and it’s visually pretty dull and the dialogue is irrelevant (for the most part) to the way things unfold. It has some competent aspects but it does fall short of the mark. I’d recommend a film called “Nine Dead” with Melissa Joan Hart. It’s of a similar nature but done a bit more professionally.

My rating for “Evidence” 4.5/10

100 BLOOD ACRES

Australian’s, Cameron and Colin Cairnes have co-written and directed their debut feature film “100 Bloody Acres”. It stars Damon Herriman (The Lone Ranger, J Edgar) Angus Sampson (Insidious) Anna McGahan, Oliver Ackland and Jamie Kristian. There is also a little cameo by John Jarratt.

Reg and Lindsay Morgan (Herriman and Sampson) are brothers living on a country property in South Australia. They run an organic fertiliser business (mentioned in a catchy little jingle on the radio haha). The brothers are In need of a fresh supply of the secret ingredient that makes their product the best. Reg is a bit of a half-wit, so in an attempt to impress his brother he ends up kidnapping a trio who are on their way to a music festival. Lindsay realises the secret ingredient is from the human body. What ensues is frantic carnage with comedic results.

Damon Herriman as Reg absolutely steals the show. It’s fantastic that the film is shot in the state that I live in and that Damon is also from Adelaide. He has done some huge Hollywood films so it’s great to see him return to do an Aussie film. The writing for his character is brilliant, plenty of slang Aussie words and a real down to earth quality about him. Because Reg isn’t the smartest bloke, we get great lines like “If the stars are maligned” haha. His brother Lindsay is equally as funny as the bossy big brother. He has a colorful vocabulary throughout the film and at times it seems a little forced. Although most of the insults are directed at poor Reg and are very funny. I think Angus and Damon would have had a blast making this together, the banter is really genuine. I will make mention of the next generation of young actors in this. Oliver, Jamie and Anna are all great as well, very smart casting choices. The chemistry of the three were really good. Some great humour and some serious moments as well.

Jamie played “Wesley” the typical asshole best friend mixed up with James (Ackland) girlfriend and caused a lot of problems throughout the film. Even though you know this guy is a real twit, he is still somewhat likeable. The only scene that I felt was wasted was the “acid trip” scene, it didn’t really accomplish anything, other than just being a stupid scene. The look of the film is great. You get a real feel for rural South Australia, the dry and desert landscape we have here (haha). The music is truly horrible in the best way. “Classics” from artists like “Slim Dusty” and basically anything you would hear on Cruise FM. It bought back some memories from my teenage years, it was dreadful but in a good way (haha).

There is absolutely fantastic dark humour throughout the film. It takes itself serious enough to command attention but anytime it looks like it might toe the line between fun or macabre, we get some comedy. Lindsay trying to wind the roller door up manually while Wes is getting away in the car was hilarious. I’ve had to wind one before so I know what it can be like. The Rebecca Gibney gag was pushing the limit just enough to be funny. I thought it was really humourous especially because you get a little reference early in the film, but you don’t put two and two together. The sex scene was very funny as well, vomit worthy gross, but still funny.

To my surprise there was some good natured gore in several scenes, they looked great. Prosthetics were also commendable. The more violent scenes are always light and fun, I never felt the film was trying to do anything for shock value, only for comedic purpose. That’s a hard thing for a director to gauge when writing a script like this one. The only scene I could pick a bit of an issue with was when Wes was getting away to try to find help. He pulls up and doesn’t take the keys out of the van, rookie mistake. Although he has been doing drugs, so maybe that’s why. It also lags a bit in the middle of the film, for the most part though the pacing is good. It’s such a fun film.

What we have here is Australia’s answer to “Tucker And Dale vs Evil” which is one of the best horror/comedy’s of recent time. This also had a little bit of “Blood Car” (a small indie flick) about it. The fact that this is filmed so close to home and the performances are hilarious just adds to the experience. The actors have fun with the script but are professional about it, it never loses grip on what Its supposed to be. I would go as far as to say this is the best Aussie film I have seen in a long time. Definitely one of the best South Australian films, it’s a real gem. It’s currently showing in cinemas around Australia, so do yourself a favor and check it out!

My rating for “100 Bloody Acres” is 7.5/10

THIS IS THE END

Written by Evan Goldberg and Seth Rogan “This Is The End” is a comedy about the apocalypse, The Biblical end of days. A group of “celebrities” including the likes of Jay Baruchel, Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, Craig Robinson and Danny McBride attend a party at James Franco’s house. During the party destruction reigns down upon the earth. The remainder of the film is the group trying to survive in James Franco’s house with the supplies they have left, yes that’s it.

That is the basic story (if you want to call it that). At the beginning of the movie, Jay has come back to LA to visit Seth Rogan to catch up on old times. Seth invites Jay to James house for the party, against Jay’s better judgement he says okay. While they are out getting supplies the apocalypse starts and they have to make it back to James house. There are a bunch of little cameo’s in the film from Michael Cera, Jason Segal, Nick Swarsdon and many more.

There were a few decent and clever lines of comedy in the film but they were few and far between. The milky bar skit was enjoyable. Also when the wormhole opens up outside the house and people are falling in the hole. I found Craig Robinson and Jonah Hill to be the two funniest in the film. I read somewhere the actors wrote most of their own lines, I question how funny are these actors then? I like Seth Rogan but for him to write such utter garbage like the dialogue that is dribbled in this film, I begin to doubt his writing ability. Danny McBride is terrible in the film, very unlikable and excessively crass. If this is really Danny, I’m not impressed. James was okay, then again he doesn’t come from a comedic background so I didn’t have the same expectations. Moreover, the best comedic actors like Jason Segal and Paul Rudd weren’t utilized anywhere near enough. They just had small cameos for a cheap laugh.

The music throughout the film wasn’t bad, the little addition of one of the most well-known groups of the 90’s performing a hit single was entertaining. I think one thing that was clever about the script was the actors actually playing themselves. They had the opportunity to say what they wanted about each others previous films etc. That much was original. The monsters/demons whatever you wish to call them were part of the Apocalypse and they were good. I thought they looked impressive (the fake penises were funny) and some of the action sequences weren’t too bad either. The gore based effects were the best thing about the film. I thought they would be very slapstick and look funny. They were funny in away but at the same time they were graphic, lots of blood.

However, the negative aspects far out weigh the positives. This contains barely enough story to even make a movie. Films with people doing various drugs and acting half their age just aren’t funny. Personally, I don’t think they have ever been funny maybe I’m just to mature for that childish humour. The jokes that start out funny in this film are taken so far out of context and to a ridiculous extent that they lose any merit. Constant masturbation and penis reference jokes, f-bombs dropped every 10 seconds just for the sake of it. If you’re relying on these cheap and nasty gags to be funny then maybe your just not witty enough to write a decent comedy. Someone forgot to tell Seth Rogan that making light of a serious subject matter like rape, isn’t funny. It’s never going to be funny and even for a male viewer you’re pushing your limits.

There is very little to like about this. I have lost a bit of respect for all that were involved in this. James needs to stick to serious films. Seth needs to think about his ideas and execute them a lot better. Danny McBride has done his dash with me, I won’t watch anything else that he appears in. The most important thing I learnt from “This Is The End” is that when you cross Exorcisms, Apocalypses and a House Party, your end result is failure. This one’s a spud guys..

My rating for “This Is The End” is 3/10

WORLD WAR Z

Marc Forster, director of (Stranger Than Fiction, Monster’s Ball) released one of the most anticipated films of the year. “World War Z” stars Brad Pitt as Gerry Lane, a UN employee who is sent in search of a cure for an infection that has turned much of the world’s population into zombies. Mireille Enos (Gangster Squad) plays “Karin” Gerry’s wife. We are also introduced to Daniella Kertesz who plays “Segen”. I believe this is her first feature film. There are a few appearances from other familiar faces like James Badge Dale (The Pacific mini-series) and David Morse (Green Mile, Disturbia).

The opening scene of the film gives us an introduction to The Lane family, although it’s really a nothing scene that doesn’t give any insight into their family dynamic. It’s less than 10 minutes in and we get the most action packed and frantic scene of the film. Stuck in traffic on the streets of New York, there is a zombie outbreak. Some of the chasing and escape scenes in this part were pretty impressive. As was the makeup of the zombies who were in the early stages of decaying. The Lane family holds up in an apartment complex with another family. Gerry contacts the UN, I think? or it may have just been a contact he knew from the UN. For some reason the guy is already on a navy ship? Any who, It turns out Gerry has experience in dealing with government threats and high pressure situations. They (not really sure who?) choose him to lead the charge to find a cure for the infection that is spreading at a rapid pace.

Right from the beginning of the film there is little to no connection or background of the family. The crucial element was always going to be on Pitt’s character because he is the main focal point but we get so very few details about his life. He is apparently some sort of expert but it’s never explained how or why? What was his actual job? Did he work for the UN? Was he a researcher? Nothing was ever clarified some flashbacks would have helped. The dialogue in the film is all very bland and doesn’t progress the story at all. Nothing of any importance is ever said. There is no emotional connection to anyone in the film. Ideas are borrowed or directly stolen from other films. The line at the end about “The War goes on and we continue to fight” or something to that extent, is a blatant rip-off of Terminator. The science aspect was pretty embarrassing too. You would think the UN would send teams of researchers to different countries, in the hopes of finding a cure wouldn’t you? Instead we get Gerry and one other young scientist who is babbling algorithms for most of his scenes. Seriously? and of course the young scientist (who knows every detail) gets killed and this leaves Gerry to carry out the entire operation? (Yeah that’s realistic). The one guy who knows what’s going on would be guarded like Fort Knox! come on…

I quiet enjoyed the scene at the military complex. It actually contained some decent acting and tension in the action sequences. James Badge Dale was impressive in his small role and actually gave us some insight into the situation. After Gerry survives the attack on the complex and another catastrophe (via aeroplane), he then all of a sudden, without warning is at a medical and research facility. He never makes it evident through any dialogue with Segen or the UN that he has a plan. How does he know where the centre is? Does he just stumble across it by good fortune? We don’t know the answers to any of these questions.

I could see Gerry injecting himself with some sort of antidote in the hopes of finding the cure (or of course killing himself). Frankly I think the story would have been less predictable and more enjoyable if he actually died… but of course he doesn’t. I think every character at some point in this film takes the dumbest possible action to attempt to achieve something.

The acting from everyone was passable, honestly they probably did all they could with how the characters were written. Daniella was probably the standout Segen was the only non cliché character and had more than just one dimension to her. Brad was okay, the biggest issue was the lack of development of Gerry. The suspense in the opening apartment scene fell flat on its face. We get lots of rapid camera work, too much fluorescent lighting and heavy sound effects. If something jumped out at you, you wouldn’t have even known it.

I liked the big walls that are built to keep the zombies out. Even though it was entirely CGI generated this sequence looked great. It was ruined pretty quickly though because everyone in the film is told that noise attracts the zombies. So what do the people on the inside of the big walls do? Play music and sirens go off and they sing and dance and talk on a megaphone?? Seriously… this is really bad. If your going to write this in the script go the whole nine yards. Have someone fire a bazooka or something! It’s so illogical and dumb you can’t possibly take it seriously. Don’t even get me started on the lack of blood and gore effects in the film. First of all Zombies don’t bleed black. They don’t even kill many people throughout the film, they just spend a lot of time making constipated noises and running around. Honestly some of it felt comedic to me, I know that wasn’t the intention but I’m sure I wasn’t the only person thinking that.

There were some things to like about the film I thought some of the action wasn’t bad, the performances were all that they could be and the score was decent too. The biggest issues are all in the script, the pacing and the action sequences (or lack of). This is a perfect example of how to ruin Zombie films by making them “Hollywood” and family friendly. This should have been a PG release. It was marketed as a horror/sci-fi film when really, it’s just a family fun film with virtually no blood and gore. Hollywood needs to leave zombie films to the independent film market because they actually know how to make a successful one. This was 170 million dollars of disappointment.

My rating for “World War Z” is 5/10

THE GREAT GATSBY

Baz Luhrmann returns to direct his first feature film since “Australia” in 2008. This his is adaption of the popular novel “The Great Gatsby” by F. Scott Fitzgerald. The film stars Leonardo DiCaprio as “Jay Gatsby”. Leo is supported by an amazing cast. Including the likes of Tobey Maguire, Joel Edgerton, Carey Mulligan, Jason Clarke, Isla Fisher and many more.

The story is about a midwest war veteran “Nick Carraway” played by Tobey Maguire. After returning home from the war, Nick develops a fascination with his neighbour Jay Gatsby who is a very wealthy and respected man. The film is wonderfully narrated by Tobey Maguire as he recalls his past experiences with Gatsby and the people closest to him. We get a fantastic introduction to New York City in the 40’s and Nick’s first meeting with Tom and Daisy Buchanan (played by Joel Edgerton and Carey Mulligan). Tom and Daisy have a very dysfunctional relationship. Tom is having an affair and thinks that Daisy doesn’t know. Nick finds out that Gatsby lives across the lake from the Buchanan’s. He then develops a keen interest in meeting the man whom the whole town is talking about.

Nick gets the opportunity when he is invited by Tom and Daisy and several others, to attend one of Jay’s huge house parties. While at the party he finally has the opportunity to meet Jay and the two quickly develop a friendship. The story is very simple but very effective. It depicts appearances and stereotypes of wealth and fame and the effect that gossip can have on people’s perceptions. In this case everybody has their own story about who Jay Gatsby really is. At its core this is a film about a very lonely man. Jay Gatsby appears to have the world at his fingertips and everyone in his back pocket. This is not the case, everyone in Jay’s life has a motive to be a part of it all. These motives vary from the money to his connections and ultimately to the lifestyle he leads.

Moreover, this shows the importance of the friendship Nick and Jay form. Jay comes to understand that Nick doesn’t want anything in return for Jay’s friendship. He has no ulterior motives, he just wants to understand how Jay thinks and feels. This is the key to the movie’s success, the bond these two have transcends anything else you see in the film.

This movie has the most unbelievable look to it. This look comes around once every few years, if you’re lucky. The colours are absolutely stunning, visually you can’t help but immerse yourself in this world of 1940’s yuppie America (or New York). I had to pinch myself before I left the cinema to remind me that I wasn’t going to step out into the 40’s. I haven’t ever had that reaction or feeling after a movie-going experience. The soundtrack is amazingly well put together. You wouldn’t think modern songs from an artist like Jay-z would work well in a film like this but it really does. We also have some wonderful period piece music. Jazz and Blues orientated songs in the bars and clubs.

The wardrobe is another thing that is so authentic and adds to the overall experience of the film. Everybody, down to the individual extra’s have been made up with the perfect look. The attention to detail in the aesthetic look in each frame is like nothing I have seen before. I mean every last aspect. The flowers, the furniture and set pieces, the cutlery, the gates, the gardens, the curtains and much more. The vehicles of the time also look in mint condition. Wonderful scenes driving through Manhattan, I didn’t know where to look with so much to see. Although a lot of the film was done in the studio and digitally enhanced with full CGI backgrounds, I never thought once that it was a facade. You immerse yourself to the fullest in the world that’s been created because you can’t help it. It’s that engaging.

With a running time of 143 minutes you would think this could be way to long. I disagree. You won’t find yourself looking at your watch thinking is this going to be over soon? It moves at a solid pace, there is plenty of character background and plot development. The industrial scenes look fantastic and we get some great scenes with some of Australia’s best upcoming actors and actresses. The camera work is so smooth and crisp and even when there are some steady cam shots they are blended with absolute professionalism. The acting from the entire cast is wonderful. I have been a huge fan of Carey Mulligan since Drive, she blew me away again with this performance. Edgerton puts in an anger and frustration fueled performance that I really enjoyed.

However it is both Tobey and Leonardo who have the best chemistry and the best overall performances. I have newfound respect for Tobey, he does a wonderful job of the narration and playing his part of the curious neighbour. Leonardo Dicaprio just continues to evolve and get better with each performance. His role as Calvin Candie in “Django Unchained” along with his take on Jay Gatsby are both mind-blowing. He ranges every emotion while never losing control of who the character really is. Once again proving he is the best in the business.

Other then the opening lunch scene at The Buchanan’s house being shot a little rapidly with some indistinct and choppy dialogue, I can’t say a single bad thing about this film. Honestly its an absolute masterpiece and a lesson in film making. The acting, the atmosphere and the aesthetic look of the film are flawless. Baz you have finally done it. You have given this popular piece of literature a life of its own. You may have even convinced me to read the book! I can say with absolute confidence, you will not see a better film of this epic proportion for many years to come!

My rating for “The Great Gatsby” is 9.5/10

PAWN SHOP CHRONICLES

“Pawn Shop Chronicles” is a new film from Wayne Kramer (Crossing Over, Running Scared). It’s almost three different films mixed into one. It has a wonderful ensemble cast. The likes of Paul Walker, Matt Dillon, Brendan Fraser, Vincent D’Onofrio, Norman Reedus, Elijah Wood and DJ Qualls. In their own right all these actors are great, so I was pretty excited to see this. Walker is the star of the first segment, playing a meth head named “Raw Dog”. Raw Dog and his brother Vernon (Lukas Haas) along with Randy (Kevin Rankin) are planning to rip off their drug dealer Stanley played by Norman Reedus. I was disappointed to see that Reedus was virtually non-existent in the story. He can give such great performances, to not utilise him wasn’t a good choice.

It’s a real diverse cast and I think that’s fantastic. The opening credits and comic book style editing were very reminiscent of another film in segments called “The Burning Palms” which I had really enjoyed. The opening segment is the strongest of the film. The comedy is brilliant. Paul Walker steals the show, his frantic itching of his face, his hillbilly southern accent and constant profanity is hilarious. He looks the part with his dirty skin and his cheap tattoos. The banter between Raw Dog and his brother Vernon was very funny. The character of Randy was really over the top but he still had his moments. The conversation about why rednecks or neo-nazis are supposed to hate Jewish people and the black community was so clever. It was very witty and really depicted the pointless nature of racism. I got a lot of laughs when they were discussing long noses and white supremacist groups haha.

Some of the zoom camera work reminded me of what Tarantino does in some of his films. The introduction to each segment was also really cool. Both the music and the tone of the script were hugely influenced by Tarantino. This whole film is structured very similar to Tarantino’s “Pulp Fiction”.

The second segment of the film is almost a horror film, the mood and intensity changes abruptly. Richard (Matt Dillon) stops off at the Pawn Shop, hoping to pawn a wedding ring so he and his wife can go on their honeymoon. Before he can do this he sees another ring that he claims belong to his ex-wife. She had disappeared 6 or 7 years ago and was never found. He sees this as an opportunity to investigate what happened to her. In a very unrealistic fashion, he leaves the woman he has just married in the middle of nowhere to follow the clues. There is no real closure on that situation and I didn’t find it very realistic. Questioning several less important characters, Richard eventually finds his way to a property belonging to Johnny Shaw (Elijah Wood). Richard finds out that Johnny Shaw has been capturing and imprisoning women for nearly a decade, this leads to a very violent resolution. The second half of this segment had some great gore orientated visuals. Matt Dillon was more than commendable in his role. I had no issues with it, I just think it didn’t fit this type of story.

When we finally get to the third and final segment, the film has lost most of its momentum. It’s unsure of what it wants to be. Ricky (Fraser) is an elvis impersonator who makes little to no money performing at small carnivals around the country. After a strange encounter with God? or The Devil? (not really sure what was going on) Ricky receives some talent (for lack of a better word). He starts performing to decent size crowds and eventually gets a permanent gig. The last segment didn’t really accomplish anything, it never had any real point. It was out of context with everything else. I think there was an attempt to make a connection when Ricky purchases a big gold medallion from the Pawn Shop, (Not sure why). I didn’t like Fraser’s character or his performance at all, I think it’s his weakest performance. To finish up the film with a loose connection to Johnny Shaw was also very sloppy. For one, I thought he had already died in the previous segment? Maybe I’m just getting the sequencing wrong but it seemed really unclear.

I still enjoyed this original concept however I don’t think it lived up to its full potential. The director does tie in the Pawn Shop with each of the segments and that’s a crucial element. I think the tone and mood of the segments changes to drastically for this to get a consistent resolution from each story. I think it’s the type of film you could just watch one segment. The first one is definitely the best. This is a darkly comedic tale that’s not for everybody. However, if you are looking for something a little bit different, it’s worth checking out.

My rating for “Pawn Shop Chronicles” is 6/10

GIRLS AGAINST BOYS

“Girls Against Boys” is a new indie horror flick that has been released straight to Dvd. The film stars Danielle Panabaker (Piranha 3DD, Friday the 13th) as Shae and Nicole LaLiberte (Kaboom and Dinner For Schmucks) as Lulu. Andrew Howard (I Spit On Your Grave) and Michael Stahl-David (Cloverfield) also have two smaller roles.

Shae (Panabaker) has had nothing but bad luck with all of her past relationships. She has been involved with Terry (Howard), who is married and has a daughter. Terry quickly dumps Shae in the hopes of a new start with his family. Shortly after being dumped, Shae meets Lulu (LaLiberte) who is very independent and definitely has a bad girl quality that Shae is drawn to. What occurs for the remainder of the film can only be described as a very poor excuse to exact revenge on the men these two women have been wronged by.

I like the poster for the film. It’s reminiscent of “I Spit On Your Grave” it’s what caught my eye in the first place. I thought the opening ten minute segment of the movie was very well done, but in hindsight it probably ruined any surprises later. We get absolutely nothing in the way of an introduction between Shae and Lulu. A conversation between the two at the bar they both work at, is all that is shown of them actually communicating. If they worked at the same bar surely they already knew of each other? They could have built the meeting and friendship up over time. Instead we get a piece of dialogue like “Is it a guy that’s got you down?” “Yeah” Okay friendship formed…. c’mon?

Moreover, there are endless scenes of Shae just walking around on the street looking dazed and confused. I am not sure what the point of that was? She had a break up it’s not like everything in her life was miserable? All of the apartment scenes that were shot were way to dark, it didn’t add any atmosphere to the situation because nothing was all that suspenseful anyway. The music throughout the film is blaring. Not only is it dance music in the clubs that is bursting through the mix but we get very ordinary music for the rest of the scenes too.

I can say that Danielle Panabaker did a solid job. She had the most emotional role to play and she did it well. Nicole was okay too but I do think she played it up a bit too much in several scenes. The direction the film goes is very one-dimensional, it borrows the same raw idea we have seen in other rape/revenge films. It was predictable that Shae was going to be assaulted. I will make mention of Michael Stahl-David I really enjoyed his work in “Cloverfield” and once again he was quiet menacing in his little role here. I can understand Shae wanting revenge, I think for David’s character, it’s even justified. However, to start killing off every other character for the sake of a body count is unforgivable. Did anybody else do anything that bad in the film? Anything that warranted them being killed? Probably not.

I understand they may have been depicting a slow descent into madness, but the motive is just stereotypical and a cop-out. The following is an example of some realistic dialogue (sarcasm). Shae says “I want to report a crime, I was sexually assaulted” the cop says “You look fine to me”. You have got to be kidding me? This is just baiting the audience into thinking all men are evil, kill them all. There isn’t a cop in all of America that would say that….. After all that happens there was still the opportunity to save face with some redeeming plot development and characters actions. Sadly these were never taken advantage of and by the end there isn’t anything redeemable about these characters. I commend the effort on some of the death scenes. I still think they could have been better considering this film had a solid budget.

As I was watching this is reminded me of another very poor film I saw a couple of years back. It was called “Descent” with Rosario Dawson in the lead role. It dealt with a similar subject matter, I think it worked slightly better because it was a psychological drama. It was not attempting to be a horror film. This is one you can probably pass on.

My rating for “Girls Against Boys” 4/10

SHARKNADO

Here it is, by popular demand, the much-anticipated review for the new Syfy epic “Sharknado”. It stars Ian Ziering (Beverly Hills 90210) Tara Reid (American Pie films) and the beautiful Cassie Scerbo (Bring It On:In It To Win It). I just read an article on the film that said it’s been the highest watched film that’s aired on the SyFy channel. Is it any different to anything else the Syfy channel puts out? Probably not. So why was there so much hype about this film? Of all the shark based films that have aired direct to TV, what makes this one different? I will tell you what makes it different: It’s such a fun, ridiculous movie that nobody attempts to take serious and the viewers know this. It was very well marketed and it has been very successful.

A freak hurricane is headed for Los Angeles. Fin Shepard (Ziering) a local bar owner and surfer, along with his misfit group of friends, attempt to help his family and get them to safety. Tara Reid play’s April, Fin’s wife or ex-wife? I can’t remember. Cassie Scerbo plays Nova the bartender. John Heard (Home Alone) also has an entertaining little role as the local drunk. The storm quickly gets out of control and it appears that tornado’s are on the way (Oh No!).

First off guys and girls, the title. “Sharknado” haha, Isn’t that the best thing you have ever heard? Joint names have been done with every other film so why not here? Something about that title really stuck when the film was in the process of being promoted. The cast for the most part are all solid. I think Ziering carries the film, Reid really offers nothing except a lot of bitchy snide remarks. I suppose the character was written like that. Scerbo is the gorgeous eye candy but also has some “kick ass” bones in her body! A couple of the casting choices I thought were pretty weak. For one having the token Australian “bloke” was really lame. I’m not sure if the Americans think they can appeal to us with that? If they do, I’m here to tell them you can’t. The young girl and guy who played Fin and April’s kids were really miscast. For one I doubt that both Ian and Tara would be old enough to have kids that look like they are about 30.. I guess it’s not important in a film called “Sharknado” though.

The look of the film is much like everything else on the Syfy channel, fake. It’s fake on purpose, probably due to the budget and the nature of these films. I have since read that the crew used big fans and sprinkler systems to create all the rain. The film was shot on perfect summer days and everything was simulated on the day or in post production. Complete set’s were designed in pools and backgrounds made up of CGI. Look, there are issues galore with the CGI. The sharks do look really fake, even for the Syfy channel. I like the crew to try something new and different to improve the look, but they never do. I can forgive it because I have come to expect it. The aspect of blending real life to computer generated graphics when it’s this bad, can’t be ignored.

Some of the editing and changes that were made like full CGI bridges. These were added to join an on set location that they were filming at. Surely the correct bridge could have actually been found and then water and flooding added later in post production? I am a firm believer that anything you can do practically, you probably should. I have horror films to thank for that rule. They did get the CGI blend correct a couple of times. I particularly like the ferris wheel chasing the group down the boardwalk. There is a solid amount of action packed into an 85 minute running time. The one thing I keep expecting and Syfy never deliver on, is the blood and gore factor. We get one or two good decapitation or kill scenes but majority of the kills occur off-screen or the camera just cuts away. It’s very disappointing. I don’t watch these type of films for story or acting, I watch them for the blood and gore, the fun nature of them. So when they don’t deliver on that, I’m always disappointed. Up the body count guys!

All of its issue aside “Sharknado” is a blast. It has some classic cheesy references to other low-budget sci-fi films. Cassie Scerbo is reason enough alone to watch it, she is stunning. Anything that has Steve Sanders (Ziering’s character in Beverly Hills) shooting flying sharks with a handgun as they come out of a tornado, has to be gold haha. I won’t spoil it but the chainsaw scene will go down as one of the best kill scenes the Syfy channel has ever seen! This film is utterly non-sensical and completely illogical but you know you just have to watch it. This is destined for cult status, what a romp!

My rating for “Sharknado” is 5.5/10

PASSION

Brian De Palma (Scarface, Mission Impossible) is back again with his latest film “Passion”. It’s a suspense/thriller in the vein of a Polanski film that meets something modern like “Cruel Intentions”. It stars Rachel McAdams (The Notebook, Red Eye) Noomi Rapace (Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Dead Man Down) and Paul Anderson.

This is a remake of a French film called “Love Crime”. Christine (McAdams) is the head of an advertising campaign. She has a young and talented protegé working for her named Isabelle (Rapace). Christine takes credit for one of Isabelle’s ideas and tells her it’s all part of the game and not to hold a grudge. Isabelle sets out to make her own decisions and better her career, which causes Christine to get very jealous. What start’s as a little friendly competition turns into public humiliation and eventually murder.

I never saw the original French version of the film but I had read a lot of mixed reviews about this remake. I like both actresses and I think they were cast well for their respective parts. We don’t get any real introduction to their friendship (I’m sure it’s done on purpose) but they appear to be attracted to each other. There friendship is a very strange one, especially because Christine is in a relationship with Dirk (Anderson). Christine knows that Dirk is cheating on her so she blackmails him into calling his affair off. I think it’s just part of her manipulative personality because she to has several partners. The relationships between the characters were very reminiscent of “Wild Things” or “Cruel Intentions”.

I liked the score. I’m not sure if it was intentional but it sounded very European. Lot’s of classical and piano based instrumentals. I think there was some influence from films like “American Psycho” and some of Polanski’s work like “China Town”. I respect the look of the film too. It’s very artistically shot, a lot of neutral colors. Lots of white and clear glass in the office scenes, everything is very neutral. It reminded me very much of a thriller you would have seen in the 80’s. The acting from both women is quiet good. I think it’s more of a stretch for Rachel to play such a manipulative character. Saying that I really like that she tested herself with the role and got out of her comfort zone of being the “good girl”. I liked it.

The biggest issues with the film are probably the pacing in the middle and the very rushed unclear ending. It wasn’t ambiguous, it was just downright confusing. The opening act moves quite quickly but the middle lags. We get several sub-plots involving embezzlement, insider trading and a jealous secretary. I suppose the latter comes back around in the final act, so that’s okay. Most of the film contains little or no suspense, which was very disappointing. After all that’s what I thought I was going to get, there was plenty of potential to add a Hitchcock vibe built with pure tension but it never happened. Every other move the story took was predictable and unoriginal. The mask that was used in the “murder” scene was really creepy, it’s what drew me to the film in the first place. It was only used in one scene to give off a little suspense but it should have been utilized much better.

Moreover, I didn’t like the split screen camera work during the music montage before the supposed murder. I thought it was another example of the film losing complete tone and mood. I was still enjoying the film all the way up to the last fifteen minutes. The last act seemed rushed and unresolved. I can handle ambiguous, something giving you several options and no correct answer can leave lots of room for debate. The end to this film isn’t going to spark debate, most people are just going to want to forget it. It’s not a conventional thriller, it has a European touch to it. I think it’s a little pointless especially with it already being a remake of a European film. I think it attempts to be overly artistic when it just needed to be suspenseful.

What was real?, What wasn’t? Did Catherine have a twin? Did she really die? Was it staged? None of these questions were good ones. All of its issues aside, I still enjoyed it. I just wish the final act could have had more clarity and not been so rushed and of course more of that creepy mask! Suspense is the key Brian.

My rating for “Passion” is 5.5/10